choices, family, priorities

Birthday Party Math

standard November 19, 2010 2 responses

C has 10 children in her class and a number of other friends in after care.

Little L has 14 children in her daycare and 23 children in her class at preschool.

Add all those up and you have 47+ children. Add in our personal friends who have children and we could potentially be attending one or more birthday parties per weekend.

For the sake of the math, assuming we wouldn’t be invited to each and every party, let’s say that’s a potential 50 parties per year.

I try to keep birthday present purchases to anything between $10 or $15. Which, if my math is correct, means I could potentially be spending over $500 on birthday presents each year.

Now I know my kids love their friends. And I know it’s important to be involved in the school communities. But between school, daycare, and work we don’t see each other a whole bunch during the week. When the weekend rolls around I don’t want to rush to Target to grab a gift and then rush to a birthday party every day.

So it might make me unpopular with the kids and with some of the parents, but this year I’m making the executive decision to be extremely selective with the parties we RSVP yes to. If the child is a close friend or a family member we’ll go. If we’re very close or friendly with the parents we’ll go. For all others we’ll reply early with a polite “no thank you.”

It took me years to learn that I didn’t have to say yes to everything. Maybe this will be an early way to teach my daughters that they can opt out of social events if they want. Social repercussions be dammed. Family and sanity first. Social obligations second. That’s how I’m rolling this year.

balance, family, priorities, weekend

Weekends are for family, not work

standard April 12, 2010 4 responses

I try very, very hard to turn off the computer on Friday evening and leave it off until Sunday evening. Back when I was the Managing Editor of the paper every single one of my days was sucked into the computer. I had to keep it on – just in case.

Once I quit the paper I resolved that weekends were for family. Just family. Not email. Not blog reading. Not Skyping, IMing, or even Tweeting.

For the most part I’m really good about my no-computer weekend resolve. Granted, I sneak a peek at my BlackBerry every so often, but I do try hard to stay off the actual computer.

The kids appreciate it, the husband appreciates it, and frankly, I like it too. I get to read more, play more, and just relax more.

Then, every so often, a weekend like this one rolls around where I have to keep a closer eye on the BlackBerry and then I actually have to get on the computer and work for a bit.

I had no idea it would cause such stress.

Because of a scheduling snafu I was late in lining up someone to interview for the column I still write for the paper. My article was due Friday, so I needed to find someone fast, schedule the interview fast, and get their story fast.

Fast turned out to be today.

I spent yesterday stalking my email and today prepping for the interview that I had managed to schedule during nap time.

Have you ever scheduled something “during nap time?” It’s code for “the kids will wake up the instant you start whatever it was you were trying to do while they sleep.”

I looked C in the eye and explained that I was going to be on the phone and she could. not. talk. to. me. at all. until I got off. She nodded solemnly and went to go hang out with her daddy.

Much to my shock they actually listened to me and no one talked to me or even came into the kitchen for the first 40 minutes of my call. Then C came to ask me something. I did some crazy waving and shooing away and she actually left the kitchen. Moments later Little L came to see me, only she didn’t leave quite as willingly. I had to apologize to my interviewee for the screams that rang loud and clear into the phone as M hauled Little L out of the kitchen.

I stayed on the phone and tiptoed into the living room, throwing a bag of popcorn to M before scurrying back to the safety and quiet of the kitchen.

A few minutes later I was able to wrap up my call and hang up. I had all my answers and a good feel for the article. I could hear the kids digging into the popcorn happily and I went to thank them for being so good and patient with me.

“I’m sorry I came to talk to you mommy.” C said sadly, looking up at me with her big eyes. “I just couldn’t take it any more!”

I understand her well. I couldn’t take it either. It was brutal being in one room working while they played in the other. I wanted to be with them, enjoying our weekend time together. We’re apart all week long. The weekends should be for family and family alone. It was good to have a reminder of that.

chaos, humor, priorities, Uncategorized

My TV!!!

standard February 20, 2006 Leave a response

As I was writing my other, oh so serious post, something horrible happened.
My TV went ‘poof’ and the picture went out.
Poof… no Grey’s Anatomy tonight.
Poof… no Charmed.
Poof… no Sesame Street in the morning for C while I pump.
Poof… just a blank orange wall for us to watch.

It’s oh so very sad.
Thank goodness Tivo is recording everything.
Hopefully soon my sad keening will clue M into the fact that something needs to be done to remedy this sad sad situation*.

*He wants to hold out until we have enough money for a Flat screenHDTV.
I’ve told him he can’t have that until he signs a contract for a job in the fall. (It’s something of an incentive.)
If he knows what’s good for him, he won’t wait until then!