30 days later, barely 4lbs lighter.

standard May 26, 2009 6 responses

I did it. I stuck it out. Except I didn’t really.

Wait. Wait. Hear me out!

I did watch my diet and exercise for 30 days. It’s just that I didn’t exactly follow the prescribed plan for the full 30 days. I started out strong, and for two weeks I kept at it like a dog with a bone. I mean, I ate every single little thing that was on the menu plans and not a scrap more, and I did every single exercise routine I was assigned, and yes, even a little more. After two weeks I had lost three pounds, regained two, and I was going insane.

I’m very, very anal when it comes to dieting/lifestyle changing. Tell me what to do and I will do it to the letter, even if it kills me. But I like flexibility. Or rather I need flexibility, because my life is terribly unpredictable. If a friend calls me at the last minute to beg me to come have lunch with her it’s going to kill me that my carefully measured English Muffin and two tbsp of peanut butter with a side salad is waiting for me at home. And if my kids are out of control one morning and I can’t scramble my three egg whites and sprinkle them with cheese before running out the door I’m going to be pretty unhappy.

So after two weeks of making myself and my family miserable I realized that I needed to step back and reassess the situation. I can lose the weight and get back into shape if I follow a smart, healthy, flexible plan. Like, say, Weight Watchers, which fits perfectly into my need for flexibility and my craving for a plan that I can follow to the letter.

Two weeks ago I hauled out my Weight Watchers binder and journal, I calculated my daily points allotment, and I went grocery shopping for all the foods that I’d been missing. For the last two weeks I’ve been on track, eating well and exercising daily. I haven’t felt insane or trapped, and I know that I can do this for the long haul. Which is a good thing, because it’s taken me a month to lose just over 4lbs and I have another 11 or so to go.

I guess I can’t do anything for 30 days, but since I learned to listen to myself and do what’s right for me instead, I think can live with that.

I can do anything for 30 days

standard April 28, 2009 4 responses

Tonight I got kicked out of the kitchen by my family for being overly grumpy. Seriously. They took a vote and decided unanimously that I needed to go chill out in another room.

Harumph.

It’s not my fault I’m grumpy. It’s the chocolate’s fault. Or rather the lack of chocolate, and bread, and candy, and everything else. I’m grumpy because I hate feeling like I can’t eat whatever the heck I want. Nothing makes me crave food more than knowing I can’t have it.

On the flip side, nothing makes me feel better about myself than being able to control my urges and seeing the result on the scale. It’s shallow, I know, but there it is.

Today I started a new weight loss program. It’s a 30 day deal. 30 days of planned meals and scheduled exercise. 30 days. I can do 30 days without chocolate and without candy and without the freedom of being able to eat whatever pleases my fancy.

I knew day 1 would be hard. I’ve cut out sugar in the past. It’s like a drug for me. The first few days are hell, then it gets easier and easier to resist. I knew that I would be fine for the first 2/3rds of the day and that I’d get crabby and hungry just around the time I brought the kids home from daycare. I had a hunch that that was when my resolve would falter and I’d get grumpy at the thought of another healthy meal for dinner. I worried I wouldn’t get through the day without cheating.

What I didn’t take into account was my family, who, instead of letting me get grumpier and grumpier, sent me out of the room to chill out with a cup of tea and a handful of carrots. Ten minutes later I felt better, the hunger had passed and I was more relaxed and able to face the evening.

Now there are 29 days left on this new plan. 29 days. I can do 29 days. Can’t I?