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Random Act of Kindess Redux

standard January 10, 2011 4 responses

A month ago I posted about my Random Act of Kindness issue, and granted I was beyond stressed at work, but the comments drove me batty for the most part.

I love you guys, I really do, but I must have been having trouble conveying the difference between random acts of kindness and random acts of charity, because 90% of the comments were of a charitable nature rather than kindness nature.

Then I let go of the ire and focused on what was really happening.

While at first I chaffed at the notion that not everyone was worthy or deserving of kindness, I quickly realized that the issue wasn’t the kindness, the issue was the money.

With spare cash to hand out, we panic, we freeze.

I did.

I’ve had that $100 burning a hole in my pocket for a month.

I wanted to do something nice for someone at the airport. I did. I kept my family away from as many people as possible to keep from spreading the stomach flu more than absolutely necessary.

I wanted to pay for some coffee at Starbucks. I never found the right opening.

I would have paid for someone’s food in a drive-thru line. There are none that we ever frequent.

I would have paid for someone’s gas, but the logistics were beyond me. I couldn’t leave the kids in the car to go inside and pay.

I made up for it in a ton of little ways – holding doors, smiling at strangers, chatting up people. I even gave computer support to a Starbucks patron! But I never doled out the cash.

After a month it finally occurred to me that it’s not the recipients that are the issue – we’re all worth of kindness. It’s the money. When you throw money in the mix it shifts the balance.

If I smile at four people and turn their serious looks upside down, odds are they’ll smile at four people themselves, and keep the smile ball rolling. But if I buy someone coffee and ask him to pay it forward, I’ve essentially indebted him to someone, not something I feel good about.

So I’m eating my words. And I’m taking the $100 and conducting a random act of charity. One that makes me feel like I’m also doing a random act of kindness.

Did you know that diapers aren’t covered by WIC in California? So you can get formula and food for your kids, but you have to pay for diapers out of pocket? Consider how many diapers a child goes through in a childhood. (Also, please remember that you can’t wash diapers in laundromats and that diaper services are more expensive than disposables.)

A woman showed up at a local shelter last month and told the shelter director that she had been limiting her baby’s food and liquid intake so he wouldn’t use as many diapers.

She was limiting his food and water intake because she didn’t have diapers.

And I have $100 I don’t know what to do with.

I can’t donate $100 every month, but on the months I can, I’ll be donating to Help a Mother Out, a local organization that donates diapers to women’s shelters.

For the mom it’s a random act of charity. For the child… a random act of kindness. It’s a solution I can live with.

Do you have a random act of kindness to share? Spread the word and inspire others on the Yahoo! Ripples of Kindness site. 

Please note. I promised $50 to two commentors on the last post. I still haven’t awarded that money. I’ll pick two people at random tomorrow night, so if you want a chance to get $50 for a random act of kindness – or yes, charity of your own – go forth and comment.

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4 responses

  • Diapers aren’t covered by WIC? That really is sad. I am so grateful for all that I have. I try not to take it for granted. I’m fairly spoiled with all that I have…Alas.

    Anyhow, I think your choice was excellent. Diapers. So basic.

  • What a great choice for your charity. I know the women you’ll e helping out will be so grateful!! Thanks for your thoughtfulness in this entire process!

  • I knew that about diapers and WIC. Ridiculous! I love random acts of kindness. I feel like they earn you brownie points you may need someday. I always cook whenever someone is sick in hopes that it wards off future sickness from me.

    You are doing a great thing in charity and in spreading the word!

  • Rachel said its sad diapers aren’t covered by WIC. But as a current WIC client I have to say I don’t find it sad at all. Many people on WIC don’t need help paying for diapers and WIC is a nutrition program not a clothe your baby program. WIC can’t cover every needed expense a baby has. . . that’s not what it was intended for.

    I blog about WIC (www.wicwoes.com) there are a lot of bad things I see about WIC but not buying diapers is not one of them.

    I do think that it is WONDERFUL the owner of this blog is donating money for diapers to a charity though. Diapers are expensive and the cost of them gets high quick! It is good their are charities that help with diapers! I just don’t think that is something the WIC program should undertake.

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