A glimmer in the quest for balance

standard January 13, 2011 5 responses

Other than the need to define my “word,” the movie Eat, Pray, Love left me with a quote that kept resonating in my head and my heart.

“Balance is never letting anyone love you more than you love yourself.”

I heard that and something clicked. In my eternal quest for balance in my chaotic life, I’ve always looked for everything to be balanced inside my head, inside me, but what if that quote illustrates the simple central notion to balance? What if instead of everything being balanced within me, it’s about being balanced within versus without?

  • Never letting others believe in you more than you believe in yourself. 
  • Never letting others challenge you more than you challenge yourself.
  • Never letting others expect more or less of you than you expect of yourself. 

It’s not just about all the things in your head and your heart being balanced against each other, it’s about you being in balance with the world pushing up against you.

I headed up to bed after the movie ended, my head spinning with the revelation.

You don’t balance in a void. You balance within your world. There’s the world and there’s you. The two halves of the scales have to match.

I’ve always thought that finding balance was something that happened inside, but really what you have to dig deep to find is the counter pressure to what the world is throwing at you. You can only feel where that pressure is hitting when you stop to focus on it. Taking time to listen and take stock helps you work thought the noise and the chaos. A whining child is an overwhelming annoyance until you focus and discover what is causing the distress and the ensuing noise. Once addressed – hunger, exhaustion, frustration – the annoyance disappears. The counter pressure has been applied.

“Who is expecting what and how does it compare to what I’m expecting of myself?”

Answer that question honestly and you’ll be on the way to finding that coveted balance.

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5 responses

  • Sometimes, when I read your blog, I feel so shallow. I have never really wrestled with the idea for balance–and so I wonder if that means I’m not adding enough to my life or I’m too easy going…

    However, in your quest, I pray you find what it is you’re looking for. I suppose that makes me deep, enough…?

  • Freakin amazing thought here m’dear. I read EPL and loved the authors perspective and humor.

    And can we all please meet at an Indian Ashram where we can do nothing but meditate for 3 months?

    (I would fail, the talking part, but you know what I mean). Let’s meet at a spa in Tucson instead.

  • Thanks for this post, all things that I need to remember, remind myself daily in fact!!

  • All so true! Isn’t it funny that we think about it briefly but never REALLY think about it until someone writes it. Thank you, I needed this!

  • Jessica, this is a very nice post! Indeed, balance must be achieved in all areas of our lives. I just never thought it could be applied this way.

    Thanks for sharing that wisdom nugget from that good movie.

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