They write well. Compellingly so. More importantly they have a knack for sharing just enough about their innermost selves, to reel you in and turn you into a fan.

You read a post, a second post, a third, and soon you’ve read back all the way through the archives. Then you come back every day to read a little more.

The writing is what makes the “popular” bloggers popular. But they don’t call themselves that, we call them that, and for the most part, as far as I’ve seen, it makes them intensely uncomfortable.

They are not intentionally clique-ish. They just feel awkward surrounded by people gushing and fawning over them. And who wouldn’t want to gush and fawn over someone whose blog you read religiously?

I’ve done it. I’ve “squeed” in someone’s face. I’m mortified to admit it. (And no, I’m not telling you who I did it to.)

The “popular” bloggers have fans, loyal readers, because they put themselves out there every time they write a blog post. They put vulnerable parts of themselves out for the world to see. And it’s one thing to do that at home, in your jammies, behind the safety of a computer screen. It’s another to be in front of one, ten, fifty people who have read their words and seen right into their souls. Unlike High School where the popular girls craved the attention, I’ve rarely met a blogger who really wanted to be in the limelight.

They’re not complaining. They chose to write like this – to dump, vent, turn pain into poetry. But it’s hard to look people in they eye and see that pain reflected there.

So they hide, they keep to themselves, and sometimes they hide together.

That’s when you hear others grumble. “The popular bloggers are stand-offish.” “They think they’re better than us.” “They don’t have time for the likes of us.”

It’s not true. It’s not what’s happening.

They’re well known because they write well and without pretense. They strip themselves bare day after day. Then in public they feel vulnerable and exposed. But really, they’re no different than me or you. We just know more about them than they do about us.

They’re bloggers with the same fears and insecurities. They put their pants on one leg at a time like everyone else.

So next time you see a huddle of “popular” bloggers standing off to the side, take a second before reacting. Remember that they’re just like everyone else. Stop and say hi. Make conversation. Later, work that “I love the way you write” into the conversation. Just remember that it could be you who’s inapproachable rather than the other way around.