Yesterday I discovered a delicious little book by Adair Lara called You Know You’re a Writer When… filled with fun little quips collected from writers about their occupation. Crack open the little blue book and you’ll come across such gems as:
You know you’re a writer when….
… writing is the only thing that makes you happy, and you hate writing.
… you hire a babysitter to watch your kid so you can go to your office and write about how much you love him.
… you have an opinion on the serial comma.
… you don’t know what you think until you see what you wrote.
And my personal favorite
… you relish reading a junky novel because every paragraph reminds you of how much better a writer you are than the author. At the same time you are sick to your stomach: this hack at least got published.
I chuckled and nodded knowingly almost every time I turned the page, but at the end I thought up a few that they seem to have forgotten.
You know you’re a writer when…
…you own many pens and they are each equally essential in their own way. If you have the wrong pen you aren’t able to write.
…you know just how much coffee you can drink before the jitters interfere with your typing.
…you mourn the loss of each and every notebook, despite the hundred others you have in your car, at home, or in your bag.
…you dream about your characters more often than about your friends or family.
…you are convinced that every story you forget because you didn’t have the right pen and notebook on hand to jot it down was the story that was going to make you win that Pulitzer.
I went to bed way too late last night, or I’m sure I could come up with a few more. I’d better make sure I have the right pen and notebook with me this afternoon so I can be sure to write them down before I forget.
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