Bwahhh work! Bwaahhhh sick baby*! Bwwaaah work! Bwaahhhhaaa biting toddler**? Whaaaa?
Now you know what it’s like inside my head this week. You’re welcome. I know you really wanted to know.
Between the looming deadline that is driving me crazy at work, and the feverish baby I haven’t known where to focus, haven’t been able to focus anywhere really. I’m jumping around trying to bring my A game both at work and at home and failing pretty miserably on both counts I’m sure.
I’m beginning to suspect that maybe my project won’t get done on time and I’m starting to wonder how wrong it would be to send Little L to daycare tomorrow. And I’m horrified that the former makes me more anxious than the latter. If that isn’t a sign of messed up priorities I just don’t know what is.
In a sense I am glad that Little L got sick this week. Not because she’s sick, come on, I’m no monster, but because it killed any lingering doubts that I might have had about quitting my job. I no longer ever want to be in a position where I have to chose between my children’s needs and employer’s needs. It shouldn’t even be a contest, and yet, somehow it is, and someone always loses.
* Little L’s fever finally broke sometime in the middle of last night after it peaked at 104.7F. When she woke up she was feeling much better and her fever has continued to go down all day. Phew.
** Randomly, for the first time ever, C bit a friend at daycare today. She was not provoked and she had no good excuse for her infraction, not that any excuse would have been acceptable. We’ve had a few good long talks about what she did and why she was never, ever going to do it again. Oy.