Listen? You hear that? All over the blogosphere people are getting down, grabbing drinks, shmoozing, and doing all those things people do at parties. (What do people do at parties? It’s been a long, long time since I’ve been to one.)
Grab a chicken wing, put on your party dress and join the peeps getting down.
It’s the Ultimate Blog Party! Whooohooo! Time to raise the roof!
“What can you bring?” you ask.
Well, I’m glad you ask! I want you to either bring some more cheese or some whine.
Come on, I’m sure you have something, anything to whine about, and since it’s always better to laugh than to cry, let’s have some whine with a healthy dose of cheese.
As the hostess allow me to start.
My whine for today?
If a bunch of people at work are quitting and it’s freaking out the people who are staying behind, why, oh why are they being obnoxious to the people staying with them? Don’t they realize it’s a terrible time to antagonize us? I need a t-shirt that says “My family doesn’t need my salary to survive. BE NICE TO ME!”
Would you like some cheese with that whine?
A farmer was milking his cow. He was just starting to get a good rhythm going when a bug flew into the barn and started circling his head. Suddenly, the bug flew into the cow’s ear. The farmer didn’t think much about it, until the bug squirted out into his bucket. It went in one ear and out the udder.
A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in
Come on. I know you want more.
A man speaks frantically into the phone, “My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart!”
“Is this her first child?” the doctor queries.
“No, you idiot!” the man shouts. “This is her *husband*!”
What? You haven’t had enough yet?
Dear God, so far today, I’ve done all right. I haven’t gossiped, and I haven’t lost my temper.
I haven’t been grumpy, nasty or selfish, and I’m really glad of that!
But in a few minutes, God, I’m going to get out of bed, and from then on, I’m probably going to need a lot of help.
OK! OK! I’ll stop, but only if you promise to take over.
Let me have it. Take pitty on a gal on a diet. Gimme some whine and cheese, and when you’re done, head on over to the Ultimate Blog Party and discover some new blogs. There are a ton of prizes just begging to be won.