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I forgot to look at the big picture

standard March 21, 2008 3 responses

I’ve been so mired in the drudgery of my day to day tasks at work that I forgot about the big picture. Every morning I get up and my heart sinks at the thought of all the phone calls I have to make and appointments I have to schedule. I worry about the things that are going to fall through the cracks simply for lack of time and bandwidth. My stomach clenches as I try to guess who is going to be annoyed or even angry with me, and I want to cry when I imagine who I’ll be disappointing. By the time I get to work I’m so worked up and depressed that I can barely get through the day let alone even try to find some joy in what I do.

Tonight the synagogue hosted a huge event in honor of Purim, a crazy fun Jewish holiday, and I remembered why I liked working there. I got to spend time with people I love and be in the thick of the amazing vibrant community that drew me to work here in the first place. It was a much needed wake up call. I’m surrounded by smart, funny, incredible people and I really need to remember to look up from my computer every so often and remember why I do what I do; it’s not about the day to day chores, it’s about being a key player in a community that brings joy and support to hundreds of people.

Who wants to be in charge of reminding me next time I lose my cool over calendaring snafus and mind numbing phone calls?

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3 responses

  • Well, I would offer to remind you…. but I would probably have lost my mind a day before you so…. I’m glad you did get a reminder of the big picture though! Isn’t it nice to rediscover why we do what we do? No matter what it is…

  • I’m going to start calling you “Sister”, because it seems like our lives are so similar right now. The politics of my workplace are strangling on the best of days, but I stay because I can see the difference I make in the lives of the ladies who live there.

  • God, I can’t even begin to tell you how much that sounded like me. I got so depressed that it eventually led me to quit.. But unfortunately for me I was surrounded by a lot of people that thrived on gossip and even the people around me weren’t so great.

    I could ramble on about it, but I won’t. Keep your head up. 🙂

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