“Won’t you get in trouble for not going to class?”
“Well, actually no, turns out I’m a grown-up and I can do what I want.”
I sat at my desk at work this morning fighting the overwhelming urge to cry. It’s Thursday again and I’m stressed, again. I didn’t do my sewing homework, I’m nowhere near ready for class, but at least I have a friend coming to help M with C tonight.
As the day wears on I realize just how little I want to go to class. I’m tired and cranky and I just don’t think I can handle three hours of trying to play catch-up. What I really want to do is pick up my daughter, go home, and relax with my husband and friend. Sometime in the middle of the afternoon I realize that no one is making me go, I’m the only one responsible for my actions. I signed up for the class because I wanted to learn to sew for my own pleasure. It was supposed to be something fun, something I enjoyed doing. Instead it’s been four weeks of constant stress.
I’ve enjoyed actually learning how to use my machine, and at any other time I would have loved everything about the class. But M being out of commission at the same time as me being 7 months pregnant has made this more of a hassle than a joy. So it dawned on me, if it’s not fun, if I’m not enjoying it, then there’s no point in me going. I know there’s a lot to be said for finishing something that’s been started, but there’s also a lot to be said for knowing when to call it quits.
I called M, told him I wasn’t going. I called the teacher to tell her I wouldn’t be there tonight. I called my friend to tell her I’d have dinner with her and M. And then I breathed deeply, all of my anxiety gone. I got back to work and I smiled for the first time since yesterday. Sometimes it’s good to be a grown-up.
Pssst. New post up at The Lemonade Stand. Finally!