Being a mother in this day and age is not an easy thing. We are torn between being perfect moms and good employees. We are constantly running right and left, torn between the many bosses that rule us. We want to be the best at everything we do, and we rarely cut ourselves any slack.
Some days I long for simpler times, an era where less would have been expected of me, demanded of me. A place where pregnant women got to rest and focus on gestating. (Hey, in my mind I’m always well off. It’s my daydream, I can be wealthy if I want!) Other days I’m thankful for the world I live in. The demands may be higher, but the resources seem to match it.
A hundred years ago I wouldn’t have been able to turn to Amazon or to a local library to find the perfect book that would help me overcome a new obstacle. And fifty years ago I wouldn’t have had the Internet, that never ending source of knowledge, help, and friendship to help me navigate the treacherous waters of pregnancy and motherhood. When I have a doubt or a problem that arises in the middle of the day or night I have an endless sea of knowledge at my fingertips. I never have to purchase anything that hasn’t been tested and tried by dozens of people before me. I have friends I’ve never met, people all over the world who have shared some of my most intimate experiences, people I treasure as much as some of my “real world” friends. More to the point, I am blessed with an ocean of mothers aching to share their experiences with me.
My mother in law suffered through countless Amnios and subsequent losses with no one to support her outside of her family. She lost a child, and survived, again, with just the help of friends and family. Older friends struggled through pregnancies on their own, no one to vent or laugh with. When I feel down or scared. When a strange ache develops in my hip, or my heartburn gets worse I have a message board full of pregnant friends to turn to, people who can say “hey! me too!”, people who can tell me what worked for them. When I feel like a looser mom for feeding my child frozen chicken nuggets yet again, I can read any number of blogs written by other moms just like me, and I realize that I’m doing a pretty good job too. And tonight, when I started my search for the perfect lactation consultant, I turned to my local mother’s group message board and within hours I was bombarded with recommendations. All from people who have never met me, but who are in the trenches with me nonetheless.
The Internet; it’s a beautiful, wonderful thing, and I wouldn’t trade it for all the rest and relaxation in the world.