The sun rises slowly and I watch it’s ascent through the kitchen window as I sip a large cup of warm milky tea. The rest of the household is asleep and I’m enjoying a few minutes of peace before the chaos sets in. The breakfast table is set and is ready for it’s daily assault. As much as I’m enjoying the quiet I can’t wait for the day to start. The weather is finally warming up and the kids and I will finally be able to play outside. We’ve been cooped up way too long.
I hear a toilet flush and I drain my cup, standing up to put some waffles in the toaster. By the time the first child walks in the toaster is already dinging. The others stream in one by one. in less than ten minutes the homey kitchen is filled with the sounds of children’s voices and laughter. Waffles, butter and syrup are being passed around, kids are pouring milk and juice for each other. In the middle of the chaos I hear the baby wake up and I run upstairs to get her up. She’s standing in her crib waiting for me to get her up. I take a minute to hug her tight and smell her sweetness before placing her on the changing table to get her ready for the day. I hear the other kids run up the stairs, anxious to get dressed and go play outside.
It’s another lazy vacation day. We don’t have to run to school. No clocks need to be punched, no schedules to be adhered to. I haven’t worked outside the home since my second baby came home and I haven’t regretted it once. I love living by the children’s schedule, some days being alone with the babies, some days having everyone home. We have a large home with an even larger yard, yet it always seems full to me, and I enjoy every minute of it.
My fantasy life; A large home filled with children, a large yard, maybe a dog, lots of time to enjoy all of it. No work, just long days filled with being a mom, a wife, an inventive cook and a housekeeping goddess.
The odds of this fantasy ever becoming reality are slim to nil. We live in the wrong place and even maybe the wrong time. I will not get to stop working in the fall, and we likely won’t have more than two or three children. But I won’t ever let go of my dream home filled with happy children, and I hope that the me enjoying this life in a parallel world is making the best of it.