I gave up my last blog because I couldn’t write knowing that my father would eventually read what was written. It didn’t matter what it was I wanted to jot down, once I sat down at the computer I would freeze up and all the resentment would bubble up and I wouldn’t be able to think of anything coherent.
I had big plans of making the last post be a letter to him explaining why I think he sucks as a father and is a failure in general. I resisted this urge mainly because it would be hurtful and useless. Instead I wrote a nice note and said goodbye. A few people asked me for the new blog address and that was that.
I’ve been checking on tracksy to see when he would read the post. I wasn’t 100% sure that the person in Vancouver reading my blog was him, but I had a strong hunch. It must have been. Yesterday the Vancouver person read the blog. Today I got an email from him. It’s the first time he has initiated contact since the day after C was born. Did I mention she’s going to be 10 months old this week?
He says he’s “pining” for news from us. I guess it was nice to be able to read about us without having to make any effort at communication.